I’m not a multitasker. I mean, sure, I can do multiple things at once, but it’s truly impossible to be fully engaged in several things at once.
I mean, I teach this stuff for a living: If we want to simplify our lives or reduce our stress levels, it’s crucial for us to practice mindfulness and quit the multitasking. Easy peasy, right?
On Sunday afternoon, hours after our weekend guests had left, Jack was in desperate need for a nap. True to form, he slept for about 30 minutes, but this time, he woke up screaming.
Even after I brought him downstairs, he continued to scream. And cry. And scream. And cry.
It was obvious that homeboy was still exhausted and needed to sleep, but he was fighting it tooth and nail. So I sat down and rocked. And shushed. And rocked. And shushed.
After a few minutes, my big fat baby was passed out on my chest; and rather than soaking up the moment, I reached for my phone to pass the time. I scrolled through Facebook. Took a selfie. Sent some texts. Checked my email. Scrolled through Twitter.
And when I felt Jack start to stir, I automatically tensed up, held my breath and hoped the stillness would keep him asleep. I wasn’t ready for his nap to end, because as far as I’m concerned, a sleeping baby on my chest is a Heaven on Earth. So why in the hell was I distracting myself?
Because it’s become a habit.
I’ve made a habit out of killing time. Rather than enjoying the still, quiet moments, I seek to fill them in any way possible. I was so mad at myself for failing to be present and mindful during this snugglefest, a joy that I don’t often get to experience anymore.
So when the stirring stopped, I put down my phone and I spent countless minutes staring at those chubby cheeks, and getting my face as close to his as I could without waking him up, just breathing in that sweet baby smell.
Will I never look at my phone again during a moment of silence? No, I doubt it. But I’m ready to break the habit.
Do you have any bad habits, or am I the only one?!
PS – If you’re in the mood for some more real talk, make sure you subscribe to this week’s Taboo Mom Talk! It’ll take place tomorrow, February 9th, at 8pm EST. And if you need to catch up on last week’s, check it out here! We’re still working out some rescheduling of Talkers, but Stephanie will be there fo’ sho’!