Momentary Lapse of Sanity

Yesterday afternoon I made a pitstop at Michael’s to stock up on Christmas necessities such as 18 feet of garland, fake cranberries, and an array of ornaments. I, along with 150 other craft-loving Americans, sardined ourselves through the aisles and getting caught on random 10-foot candy canes. I was having fun.


I have been looking forward to decorating for Christmas for weeks. I’ve been Pinning the shit out of cutesy decorative ideas and I was rip-roarin’ and ready to go.

Then, in the midst of glittery ribbon and garland, I looked down at my shopping cart and had a mini melt down. I don’t know how to decorate for Christmas. My house will never look like Martha’s or anything that I’ve seen on Pintrest. I’m a fraud.

Of course, I expressed my fear to Cory in a calm and normal manner. “Let’s just put all this shit away! I don’t want it. I don’t even know what to do with it. Just forget it!”

His response: “What the hell are you talking about?”

So I put the garland back. See ya, fake cranberries. Nice knowing you, sort-of-matching Christmas tree ornaments. To hell with all of you.

After loud whispering in aisle 7 about how I don’t know how to decorate for Christmas, Cory convinced me that I was having a momentary lapse of sanity and that I would do just fine decorating for our first Christmas.

So I went to pick up the garland while Cory retrieved the cranberries – from middle of the floor on aisle four.

If you’re married (or live with your signifiant other) do you have any “lapse of sanity” moments when preparing for any “firsts” ?

Married or not – have you started decorating?As you can see…we’re getting there.


  1. says

    Bah, don’t get fooled by those “perfect” Christmas pictures. Who wants a “perfect” Christmas anyway? Christmas is about memories…and that’s what you’re making with your new husband. Give me a mish-mash of happy over bland perfection any day!

    We put up the tree this weekend, which is WAY early. We don’t usually decorate until December, but I love how happy my living room makes me right now:

  2. Joni says

    Oh, boo-to the-hoo… girls stalk Pinterest, WOMEN go to Michael’s to make stuff to pin on Pinterest and with that mantel, you are clearly a woman. Love you. : )

  3. says

    Oh, don’t worry! It’s perfectly natural to have a little decorating anxiety! I’ve been pinning the shit out of Christmas decorations and recipes too and am 99% sure my take on everything will not be nearly as cute/pretty/sparkly/yummy but I’m okay with that. Because it’ll be MINE. 😉 And I think you’ll do great. I’m starting my Christmas decorating madness today as well. It feels way too early to be almost December, but here we go!

  4. Robin says

    Your mantle looks great, Colleen. Very classy. You will do great decorating for Christmas because you have great taste and creativity. My first Christmas decos looked like I shopped at the dollar store but with each passing year, it improved. To me, my decos are about memories of Christmas’ past. If an ornament was a gift, I can tell you who it was from and the year it was given to me and I smile at the memory of that person as I hang it on the tree. And do I have “lapses of sanity”? Ha! Yes, every year. I can spend hours arranging and re-arranging the kitchen window or a table with little decos until I have it JUST right even if I have to stay up until 2:00 a.m. getting it perfect. That’s why Uncle Timmy doesn’t even try to help me put the ornaments on the tree anymore — he knows if he hangs something on the tree, I will just re-arrange it later when he’s not looking. Geez, I’m as bad as Monica on “Friends”. Luckily I left my tree up all year this year so that worked out well. Lexie has eaten all the ornaments off the tree as high as she can reach so all I have to do is fill in the bottom. So anywho, if you find yourself arranging and re-arranging, you got it from me.

    • Colleen says

      Everything in your house always looks perfect! I’m glad to know that you’re sometimes up until the wee hours of the morning making it look so :) But yeah, the rearranging…thanks that for passing that on 😉

  5. says

    Colleen- your mantle and stockings look beautiful! Every new bride must go through similar feelings. For my first Thanksgiving dinner that I was preparing for my new husband and in laws, I freaked out and left the house after I put the turkey in the oven. I finally called my brother in law and begged him to take over. Thank goodness he did- but that story lived on and on! Too much pressure! XO

  6. says

    I can definitely see myself getting into a situation like that! My family decorated this weekend, but my mom is the one that’s into all of the crafty stuff. I’ll be married by next Christmas and I’m nervous about decorating all by myself (at any time of year, for that matter)!

  7. says

    Omg! Girl!!!! You are going to be GREAT at decorating for christmas, I promise you. I have momentary lapses of sanity, and I guess that’s fine cause of college and everything (ultimate excuse of the year), but my suggestions to you for christmas decorating would be 1. Keep it simple and 2. Choose and follow a general theme, such as all metal will be either a. Silver or B. Gold, do you want something nature-esque, classy, or more “fun”, etc. xoxoxo!

  8. Ashley Cooper says

    I had a mini-panic attack when I looked at all the surfaces of my house to decorate! Mantel, kitchen table, dining room table, buffet, coffee table, Christmas trees, yard…. It’s so overwhelming!! I had to undecorate everything and then figure out how on earth to redecorate everything – but I just figured if I take it one place at a time, it will all come together… and even if it doesn’t, there’s a certain pride in decorating your own place! Your mantel looks very cute! Love the stockings and love your blog! I’m a frequent reader!

    • Colleen says

      Thanks, Ashley!! I saw some of the pictures you post on Facebook and your decorations looks amazing! You’re right, there is a certain pride in decorating your *own* place :) I hope you and Greg are enjoying your first holiday season as Mr. and Mrs. 😉

  9. says

    eee we just put up all our decorations.. just remember you dont have to get everything this year.. wait till the after christmas sales then stock up, before you know it you will be saying.. “why did I buy 100 strings of lights? Oh right because they were 60% off”

  10. Lauren says

    Omg Colleen!! I am exactly the same way!!! I got married in September and am in the mist of trying to decorate for my first Christmas. I have no idea where to start! I have been looking on Pinterest and get so many ideas but having to execute them by myself freaks me out. Don’t worry everything will look wonderful. I love the stockings and the tree on the mantle. Just think of it as a starting point and you can always get new things to add to the collection each year :)

  11. says

    My boss told a story the other day that reminded me of this post. She said she was in Babies-R-Us and thought she would look for some girl clothes since she just found out she was having her first girl. She said she pick out a really really cute dress and then had a minor panic attack when she realized she needed a shirt and tights to go with it, got really overwhelmed, and decided to forget the whole thing. So I don’t think you’re alone!

    Love your mantle!

    • Colleen says

      I LOVE this story! I need to call my mom and tell it to her, too. When she had me, she was so worried because she has seven brothers and NO sisters! Tell your boss to give it another go. Or to have a shower…and people will do the clothes shopping for her 😉

  12. Kristen @ livinlifeinlouie says

    I love decorating! unfortuantly, I dont have the interior design gene haha. but I try! I usually start w/ a little bit at a time!


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