By playing this baby Mozart channel, I’m increasing Jack’s SAT score.
If I cry alone in the bathroom, it doesn’t count.
If I cry in front of Jack, he’ll end up in therapy.
Jack will love cuddling me forever and ever.
My mother’s voice did not just come out of my mouth.
This free coffee I make at home tastes just as good as the one I could buy at Dunkin.
Eating a chocolate chip cookie in small bites throughout the day is not the same as eating a whole chocolate chip cookie.
Giving up my paycheck to stay at home always feels worth it.
I hate Facebook.
I’ll fold that laundry today.
I’ll just go “walk around” Target.
I don’t need wine.