The Lies that Parents Tell


This past Friday I hosted what I like to call Mom Club. Several of my girlfriends came over and we let our babies roll around on my living room floor while we enjoyed adult conversation.


All of us have baby boys under the age of 10 months, and my friend, Brittany also has a 2-year-old daughter. At one point, Brittany offered her daughter a LARABAR, and when she asked what it was, Brittany so brilliantly responded without hesitation, “a chocolate bar.”

All of us giggled as her daughter accepted it as fact, no questions asked.

This, of course, got me thinking about Parent Lies. You know, the lies that parents tell their kids off the tops of their heads that kids believe to be true.

In my family, it was the tired tongue.

Whenever my cousins and I reached that point in the evening when we were being whiny assholes who were fighting sleep, our parents would line us up and say “show us your tongues.”

Without hesitation, we’d stick out our tongues and the parents would gasp dramatically, all agreeing amongst each other that we were exhausted. “Just look at those tongues!! It’s definitely time for bed!” they’d say.

And we believed them.

Guys, we were in grade school before we realized that adults couldn’t actually tell how tired we were by what our tongues looked like.

I’m not even mad.

I’m impressed.

I’d LOVE to know what lies your parents told you that you believed. (Or what lies you tell YOUR kids, because I’ll need ideas.) 


Check out Help! My Child Has Developed a New Favorite 4-Letter Word

by Rachel Will at Mode

Fueling for Yoga and a Healthy Lifestyle with LARABAR

This post is sponsored by LARABAR.


Since I quit my gym membership a few months ago, I had to start getting creative with my workouts. Although I wish I were a runner or a CrossFitter, I tend to gravitate toward lower-impact workouts. Years ago, I thought yoga wasn’t a “real” workout because it’s not overtly difficult. I mean, it’s just bending your body and focusing on your breath, right?

Ha. No.

And if I’m being honest (which is something I like to be), getting back into the swing of yoga after having a baby has been more humbling than I care to admit. It’s as if I’m starting at zero, which is not what I expected! (Then again, when have my expectations really been in line with reality during these past seven months?)

larabar yoga

Another thing I didn’t expect was turning into a ravenous beast once I got the OK from my OB to resume physical activity. Thankfully, my doctor explained the importance of staying on top of my calorie consumption and keeping a balanced diet if I was planning to work out and continue to nurse Jack. So, as a breastfeeding mom, I have a few tips for how to maintain your diet while keeping up with your yoga practice.

1. Drink TONS of water
On average, I drink around 75
ounces of water each day. I actually keep a cup of water on my bathroom sink, because chugging at least 8 ounces is one of the first things I do each day. If I become dehydrated, I feel sluggish and am prone to headaches, but it also compromises my milk supply. Needless to say, I’m drinking (and peeing) all. day. long.

larabar water

2. Get enough sleep
This is laughable, I know, but stay with me. Even though my sleep these days is subpar, I do my best to go to bed early so I can attempt to get as much sleep as possible. When I’m tired, my sugar and carb cravings are through the
roof, and I end up making poor food decisions. Also, when I’m exhausted, I make excuses for not exercising, even though yoga is something that absolutely energizes me! It’s a vicious circle.

3. Snack well, and snack often
I’m not a “three squares”
kinda gal. I need to eat every few hours, and I need to be smart about what I’m eating, because as a S/WAHM, it’s a real challenge not to snack on crap all day long. I do my best to stock our pantry with healthy snacks, and my favorite snack of all time is LARABARs. I’ve been choosing LARABAR for years because the ingredient list is normally less than five items, and I can pronounce and find each item in my grocery store. I feel confident that when I’m eating a LARABAR I’m making a smart choice for both myself and Jack.

larabar snack

4. Never travel without food
I think the word “stay”
in stay-at-home mom is funny, because I’m rarely at home. Before Jack, I could run errands or go to several meetings around town without needing food, but those days are long gone. This goes along with tip No. 3, but I make a point to pack my bag with several snacks at the beginning of the week (and restock when necessary) so I’m never caught without something to eat!

That’s pretty much it! No secret pills or magic shakesjust drinking, eating, and sleeping enough help me stay on a healthy track (most of the time!).

At LARABAR®, we believe that the foundation of a sound mind, body, and spirit is derived from what you eatand what you eat is most delicious and satisfying when it’s in a whole, natural state.

6 Ways I Keep Myself from Going Insane as a SAHM

I was super hesitant to become a stay-at-home-mom because I had no idea how to be one. These past 7 months have been filled with so much joy and frustration and love and confusion than I ever expected, but I haven’t lost my mind, which was a major concern. If you’re in the same boat, or are gearing up to be a SAHM, here are 6 things that have kept me sane.

Finding social support

In the first few months, I often cried because the loneliness was palpable. During the week, I had no social interaction for approximately 12 hours every day; an extrovert’s worst nightmare. I found myself going to the grocery store just to I could talk to the cashier. (Seriously, Maude the cashier knows who I am and talks to me every time I’m there.) But over time, by my own effort and by kind souls reaching out to me, I’ve started to build an awesome mom tribe, and they make my life exponentially better.

Making a schedule

I used to scoff when stay-at-home-moms would say things like “Wednesday is laundry day.” I take back every snide scoff because schedules like that make my life manageable and productive. Admittedly, this is still something I wrestle with because, I mean, laundry doesn’t have to get done on Mondays, right? (But truly, if I wait until Tuesday to do all the laundry, my week feels off.) In Corporate America, I thrived off of a schedule, so I knew I’d have to do the same at home. While my Tuesday budget meetings are now replaced with Tuesday playground playdates, my schedule provides the necessary framework for my week.

Getting out of the house EVERY SINGLE DAY

Unless the baby is sick, I’m getting out of the house. Some days “getting out” means running errands, but more often than not, it means taking Jack to a music class or setting up a play date with girls from my mom tribe. I’m busting through walls like the Kool Aid Man if I’m in this house for a consecutive 24 hours.

Putting on makeup

I rarely wear pants without an elastic waistband, but most days I at least put on mascara and concealer. This has absolutely nothing to do with what the Maude cashier thinks of me, but everything to do with what I think about myself. If I feel like a slob, my day feel sloppy. My mood and outlook are drastically better on the days when I make time for those few extra minutes to get ready for the day.

Doing something outside of Momming 

I mean, I’m all for ring-ring-ringing Jack’s play telephone 7,000 times a day, but come on, I need a little somethin’ more than that. Thankfully, this blog, some freelancing, and my contributor role at Best Kept Self afford me the creative outlet I need. (PSA – No one asked me to say this, but BKS is looking for new contributing writers. You can apply here)

Not “working” on the weekends

Aside from grocery shopping on Sundays (Cory and I are weird and like to do that together) all of my “work” is done during the week so Cory and I can enjoy as much family time as possible on the weekends. Obviously, this is not a perfect system, but it is the norm.

Clearly I’m still in the newbie SAHM phase, and because my training manual got lost in the mail, I’m making it up as I go along.

I don’t care if you’re a SAHM, WAHM, WOTHM or whatever other MOM acronym there is, what are some things that help you stay sane? 

It Would Be Easier to Tell Half-Truths

If you follow me on Instagram, you might have seen yesterday’s picture.

It’s certainly not a cute one, but the caption was sincere and genuine, and I appreciate every single comment that I received; although I’d be lying if I said I didn’t have a moment of panic after I shared it. I couldn’t quite put my finger on the feeling, but Stephanie (my spirit animal blogger) happened to describe it so perfectly in her post yesterday when she said:

I confess, that some days I wonder if it might just be easier to not tell so much truth, all of the time. I don’t believe in the Highlight Reel style of social media or blogging but sometimes laying all of your failures and naked truths out for the world to see on such a regular basis is hard on the psyche.


I get nervous when I share my “behind the scenes” on social media, a world where it seems like everyone else is only offering up their highlight reels.

It would be so much easier to write about the fun time I had with Jack when he was playing in the sink this afternoon and just leave it there, but if I left out the fact that I was a moron who gave him a cup to play with, which he then used to throw water all over me and the kitchen (because, duh), I’d be leaving out the best part.

Or, I could show you a smiling selfie on a good hair and make up day, but I could also show you a picture of me standing in my closet on the verge of tears because none of my clothes fit and I feel insecure in my new #mombod.

Or, I could write a post about how I make organic baby food, which would lead you to believe that I’m a “good mom” who does that kind of stuff, right? But what you wouldn’t know is that I could write an even longer post about the fact that my baby is more inclined to eat my shoe, my end table, and my phone charger before eating the actual food I prepared.

So yes, it would be so much easier to not tell the truth all the time, but then we’d miss out on the opportunities to say “me too.”

And bringing the “me too” back into momming? That’s what I’m about.

Totally Truthful Thursday

// I don’t keep a baby book.

// On any given day the thought “Am I screwing him up because of (fill in mundane activity here)?” crosses my mind approximately 957 times.

// Why is it unacceptable to comment on someone’s weight if you think they’re too heavy, but completely acceptable to comment on someone’s weight if you think they’re too thin?

// Jack has been crawling and pulling himself up on things around the house for about a week now. While this is incredibly exciting and insanely adorable, it has also added a new level of terror to my days.

// Speaking of crawling, Penny is like, “WTF?! This thing moves?”

// I was gifted some birthday money with the instruction to spend it on myself. My internal struggle is: do I go buy cute (yet nursing friendly) clothes I’ll probably never wear, or do I go buy yoga pants and other “soft clothes” that I’ll wear on a daily basis? (As my friend Shannon said, “Let’s be honest, Jack is the one getting new clothes.”)

// I stopped taking monthly pictures of Jack. You know, the ones that every single mother but me posts on Facebook these days. I was making up a chalkboard every month and having the same identical set up, and when I missed his 6 month photo I felt like a shitty mom. Why? Social media peer pressure. It’s so stupid. I have 1,000 pictures of that kid on my phone!

// I had such a powerful coaching session with Melissa Maher this week and I’m so fired up about the exciting plans I have for myself!

// If you follow me on Instagram, get ready for an overload this weekend. We’re gettin’ dressed up!

Focusing on Health + Wellness with LARABAR

This post is sponsored by LARABAR.


I know everyone and their mother is all like,  summer, wait! Don’t go! While I’m over here like,  fall, you’re finally here!

I love the summertime, but no season makes me happier than fall. The crisp air, the crunchy leaves, my favorite jeans-and-sweater attire, and the calm before the craziness that is The Holidays. I also feel like our life is at it’s most normal during this season. Our schedule isn’t dominated by travel or weekend cookouts, and we’re able to fall into a more sustainable routine. While I adore late nights and BBQs, they start to take a toll.

So this fall, with the help of LARABAR, I’m taking the time to focus on my health and wellness. Honestly? I’m tired of feeling tired. While having a 5monthold plays a major role in that exhaustion, I know that so do some of my lifestyle choices. 

So for both you and myself, here are few tips for how I’m planning on getting my health and wellness on track.


I’m putting this on the list because, like any good to-do list, you put something on there that you know you can cross off. Right? I’m in a good groove with Jack and our daily walks. I love being outside and I swear to you, that hour saves my sanity. It also makes me feel good. I’m not doing anything strenuous like running 10 miles or lifting heavy weights, but I’m moving my body and it feels right. On the days when my schedule doesn’t allow a walk, I notice that I’m more irritable and my energy level clocks in at an all time low.


Eat well, and eat often

You guys know that I’m breastfeeding, but what you don’t know is that it’s a struggle for me to eat as often as I should. I eat breakfast and then before I know it, it’s past lunchtime and I haven’t made the time to make myself snacks or lunch (because, baby.) As a result, I end up with headaches or I end up eating chips straight from the bag because I’m so ravenous that I can’t even begin to think of finding something healthy. I’ve made sure to stock up on my favorite LARABAR flavors because they’re easy to grab and go, and they’re HEALTHY. Have you ever looked at the ingredients list on a LARABAR? It’s comforting that I can read and identify all 3 – 4 ingredients. And they’re delish.


Drink Water

My water intake ebbs and flows. Some weeks I drink ALL THE WATER, and some weeks I’m dehydrated. That’s not good for any person, but it’s especially bad for a breastfeeding woman. My goal is to be more consistent with drinking water every day.

Water and LARABARs

Make ME Time

Health and wellness isn’t about just eating and exercising, it’s about the whole person. I’ve done a terrible job at taking guilt free time for myself since Jack was born, and it’s not good for anyone! When mama ain’t happy, ain’t nobody happy, AMIRIGHT?! It’s my goal to loosen up a bit and hopefully relax every now and then. I have a strong feeling this will be the most difficult goal to achieve!

At LARABAR®, we believe that the foundation of a sound mind, body and spirit is derived from what you eat – and what you eat is most delicious and satisfying when it’s in a whole, natural state.

Thank you to LARABAR to sponsoring this post.

A Baby Blues Check In

It’s no secret that I struggled for the first month or so of Jack’s life. The transition into motherhood was not a smooth one for me, and during that time, I felt like I’d never have it all under control. I felt like I’d always be fighting simply to keep my head above water.

I mean, during those first 6 weeks, it was a good day if Cory came home from work I wasn’t in the same spot on the couch where he’d left me 10 hours prior. (It was a super good day if I wasn’t crying when he got home.)

(Super good days were few and far between.)

But yesterday, while Cory went to play golf, I casually went to the grocery store, prepped lunches and dinners for the week, and got Jack to nap, it dawned on me. I’m doing the damn thing.

And not only am I doing the damn thing, I’m doing it well.

Doing it well doesn’t imply that I’m spectacular. It doesn’t mean that I have things figured out, or that I don’t make mistakes, or that my house is immaculate, or that I don’t have days where I literally throw my hands up in frustration; but it does imply that I’m no longer just keeping my head above water.

The solo grocery store trip? The prepping meals? The getting Jack to nap? (All while alone?) Four or five months ago, those were all things I never thought I’d be able to do.

I don’t have a funny story or a witty way to end this post, but because my postpartum story resonated with so many women, I felt like it was necessary to check in to let other moms know that it absolutely gets better.

And easier. And more exciting. And much happier.

potoPhotographic evidence of me relaxing on the couch. With a napping baby upstairs. CAN I GET AN AMEN!?



8 Tips for the Mistake-Prone Mom

It’s the Friday of a holiday weekend, and I won’t sleep if I don’t give you some very serious, unsolicited advice. In the past few months, I’ve learned a few things. Brace yourself for my astounding wisdom.

1. Don’t walk around the house in just your bra for too long. You run the risk of forgetting…and taking the dog out. In the daylight.

2. Don’t be a hero: drink the wine, your breastmilk will be fine. You don’t have to walk this road of motherhood alone. Wine is here for you. Always.

3. Driving long distances with your baby is more difficult than it sounds. Road trip + Google Maps’ estimated time of arrival + baby = two additional hours.

4. Need a quick panic attack? Fall asleep in bed with your infant.

5. Don’t ever say, he’s finally sleeping through the night! #jinx

6. No one thinks your baby is as cute as you do. Maybe your mother does, but that’s it. I know it’s hard to believe, but it’s the honest truth.

7. If you plan a conference call during nap time, nap time will not happen that day. Babies have a sixth sense and know when you have important plans that don’t include them. When that happens, they go HAM and obliterate any and all routine.

8. Don’t lick the mustard off your hand unless you’re sure it’s mustard. I’ll just leave this here.

Rodan + Fields Mini Review

Can I be honest for a second? I love breastfeeding, but I hate the toll that it’s taking on my hormones. Dude, my skin is all kinds of messed up, and I’m terribly self-conscious about it. I’ve tried almost everything, and nothing seems to help. I feel like a broken record, as I’ve had hit-or-miss skin for a few years now.

When Sara so kindly offered to send me some Rodan + Fields samples, I quickly obliged. It seems like R+F is all over my Facebook newsfeed these days, and I’ve be seeing some of my friends make amazing claims about the products. Needless to say, I was super interested in these products.


I took this quick (like, 30 seconds) test that determined the REDEFINE regimen would be best for me. Sara quickly reached out to me to explain what she’d be sending me and why, which I greatly appreciated!

Guys, the MACRO Exfoliating scrub that she sent me is (not pictured because I used it immediately. Sorry!) It made my skin feel so smooth. After using the products for a few days, I noticed that my skin appeared less irritated, which totally got me hooked. The only thing that’s keeping me from purchasing these products RIGHT NOW is my budget. Such is life.

If you’re struggling with your skin (like I always seem to be) and you have a budget to invest in quality skincare products, you need to reach out to Sara (or check out her Facebook page.) She’s always posting amazing stuff and she’s extremely helpful!