Can I Be Obnoxious for a Minute?

Can I be obnoxious for a minute?

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Isn’t my dog just absolutely stunning? I think she totally stole the show for our Christmas card this year. But I’d expect nothing less, because she’s a Diva Dane and I shamelessly enable her.

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*End: obnoxious dog mama brag

(*unless you follow me on Instagram)

So, I’ve totally been unintentionally MIA lately. I’m sure everyone throughout the blog land has been in mourning. Maybe someone started a Where is Colleen Wednesday (#WICW) linkup?

No? Weird. 

Seriously though, how the hell have you been? Wonderful, I hope. All is well here! I plan on taking five minutes to stop Instagramming pictures of my dog and binge watching American Horror Story (OMG WTF?!) and get back to a regular routine over here! I miss it!

I’ve got funny stories to tell, people (read: myself) to make fun of, and puppy pictures to bombard you with!

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Michael Jackson ONE

Last weekend, my mom treated Brian and I for our birthdays with a trip to Vegas to see the Michael Jackson ONE Cirque du Soleil!!

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I’ve been obsessed with Michael Jackson since I was about seven-years-old.

I would watch a certain “making-of-Thriller” video non-stop.

In second grade, I wrote a report about him during Black History Month.

I practically know everything there is to know about the man. I wish I was kidding.

For my 21st birthday, Cory and I took a trip to Vegas. The plan was to see the Beatles’ cirque (because I’m obsessed with them as well.)

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Because we’re not huge gamblers, we spent much of our first day walking the strip, popping in and out of the hotels. But it was at Caesar’s Palace where my life practically changed.

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hint: this was not the moment 

We were walking by this furniture store that I happened to notice from a Michael Jackson 20/20 special.

Oh my God, Cory! Michael Jackson shops here like, all.the.time! We need to go in and breathe the same air as he has.  

Cory, slightly nervous he had taken a psychotic girl to Vegas, was less than thrilled. As we approached the doors, I was overcome with disappointment, as the store was “closed for maintenance.”

Cory was the one to notice that a security guard was standing outside the doors, and made the assumption that a celebrity was doing some shopping. I was crushed.

I stood there looking through the windows, longingly; but as we were about to turn to leave, I saw two masked children run around from behind a corner.

My heart stopped.

Following the children was the one and only Michael Jackson.

There were no crowds. No fuss. No cameras. Nothing. Just me making eye contact with Michael fucking Jackson.

It was the most magical few seconds ever.

So, yeah, I do consider Vegas to be “our” spot. And even though I never got to ask Michael, I’m sure he did, too ;)

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Weekend Wrap Up

Hello, party people! I hope you had a lovely weekend. I made sure that mine was jam-packed with activities because Cory has been gone since Friday morning, and I get bored easily.

Friday, Jamie came over to spend the night because I simply hate sleeping alone in this big house. It’s totally rational to think that the murderers will stay away when my pretty girlfriend comes to sleep over. Right?

Saturday was brunch with Clare! She recapped our time together perfectly. Long story short, we’re in love and real-life friends now.

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Leading up to brunch, I was super excited and slightly nervous. It was literally like going on a first blind date. Lucky for us, we hit it off immediately. She’s freaking hilarious, and I loved chatting about stuff that doesn’t make it on our blogs. It was a total blast.

That night I drank way too much sangria at my neighbor’s house, and got a late start on Sunday before making the drive to Norfolk to hang out with my brother for his birthday.

We drank, obviously. And we made musical history by performing the best duet of all time.

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I totally see that guy in the back totally giving me the judge face, but what can you do? People are intimidated by our level of awesomeness.

24 Things about Brian

Happy Saturday, you beautiful people! Today is my brother’s 24th birthday, so I decided I’d make a list of 24 reasons he’s the best, coolest, most wonderful brother ever.

1. He is hilarious. I belly laugh constantly when he’s around.

2. He’s the life of the party.

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3. He has always been cooler than me. In high school, he was in a band. And I… read a lot of books.

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4. He’s never met a stranger.

5. I really, really, really love his girlfriend.

erin6. He works for Apple. I have tech support whenever I need it.

7. He has tattoos. He got his first one when he was a teenager (when I was still reading a lot of books.)

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8. Brian and Cory are great friends. When the three of us are together, I am undoubtably the third wheel.

c&b9. He is one of the nicest people I’ve ever met!

10. He taught himself how to play the guitar and the piano. I hated it when we were growing up and he was still learning because our rooms were next to each other. It was miserable…but now that we don’t live together, it’s just great! ;)

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piano11. When we were little, he used to play dress up with me and let me call him Brittany.

12. Even now, if I want for us to be matchy-matchy, he’ll do it.

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match313. He was the co-best man in our wedding.

cheers14. When ripped jeans were cool (circa 2007) he would take my mom’s sewing tools and strategically rip my jeans for me. My mom hated it, but I loved it.

15. Cory, Brian and I went backpacking in Europe a few years ago. I didn’t think anything of it until so many people said “I wish I could do that with my sibling!” (Inferring that they don’t get along with their siblings.)

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16. Sure, I love him, but I really, really like him.

17. He’s colorblind and it’s hilarious. I think we were in high school when I told him that peanut butter wasn’t green.

18. He’s a fun drinking buddy.

19. He wears things like this, and doesn’t ever get punched in the face.

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20. He’s generous (especially when he’s drunk.)

21. When we were little, my mom told us that we had to be good friends, because that’s what brothers and sisters do. We listened.

22. My best friends love him, and he easily fits into our group. (By the way, guys, can we go back to New York?)

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23. Since forever, his birthday marks a very special day for me…exactly ONE WEEK until MY birthday! ;)

24. Brian, I love you! You’re the best!

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Weekend Thoughts

  • Crucify me if you must, but I’m just gonna say it: The PSL has been replaced in my life. Dunkin Donuts has better pumpkin coffee than Starbucks. It’s fact.

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  • There are few things more frustrating than having to learn the layout of a new-to-me grocery store. Yesterday, I found myself identifying with a toddler throwing a temper tantrum in isle 7. I was so frustrated over not being able to find the fucking international isle that I, too, wanted to fall on the floor and thrash about. I JUST NEEDED REFRIED BEANNNNSSSS. 

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  • Like dangerous animals, children can sense my fear.
  • Last night, Cory’s grandpa had his first experience with Sweet Frog. I was glad to be there to help him learn the ropes. It’s so tragic to think that he had to wait 80+ years to taste the glory that is Sweet Frog.

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  • I entertain myself in odd ways when I’m out alone. For instance, when I go to Starbucks and they ask for my name, I always make one up. I giggle every time.

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  • Hey, I hope you had a great weekend! :)

Back from the Beach

I’m back from the beach! It was such a blessing to be able to spend time with the people who make up my “happy place.” We had great weather and I took full advantage of it – spending the majority of my time lounging by the pool.

When we first arrived, I handed out my gifts so we get things started off on the right foot.

Are those glasses not the cutest? I bought them for all the girls from a local shop called Its Letter Perfect. I’m working on monogramming everything I own some stuff, so I’m slightly obsessed with this place.

If the mugs were not enough foreshadowing for you, I’ll just put it out there: We like to match.

It was much less cheesy when we were in diapers, but there are some habits that ‘cha can’t shake, my friends.

We ate too much, drank too much, and probably did too much of nothing (is that really possible while on vacation?) but it was exactly what I needed! I couldn’t have asked for a better 5 days! :)

My Mom, the Champion Sportswear Fan

All my life, my mom has been this little petite woman with a slight aversion to fitness.

When I first told her that I was planning to run a half marathon, her response was not filled with pride and encouragement; no, it was “Well that sounds awful. I wouldn’t even want to drive 13 miles.”

When we’re driving and see someone running she says things like, “I wonder who’s chasing that poor man.”

I spent years asking her to workout with me, and she every time, she would literally laugh in my face.

But then out of nowhere, my mom decided that she was going to change her ways. When she asked me if I could show her “how the gym works” I felt dazed an confused.

Is this a joke? Are you making fun of me? 

No, she insisted it was, in fact, real life.  Real life it was, my friends. My mom is now something of a gym rat. She walks on the treadmill and watches Ellen. She does “the weights.” Sometimes, both in the same day.

She’s basically doing the damn thing and I could not be more proud of her. So when Champion offered to send Kate some cute workout gear for Mother’s Day, I was stoked.

She received the (surprise) package and called me saying, I’ve got something here for The Lunchbox Diaries. Why the hell did they send it here?

No, sweet mother, it’s a gift for you.

REALLY?!?!? HOW WONDERFUL!!  

She’s the cutest. My mom adores these clothes, mainly because she’s a diva and won’t go to the gym without looking cute. And cute she looks, folks!

Champion gear makes her feel confident about stepping into the gym, and for that I couldn’t be more thankful.

Kate says the clothes fit “just right” and she enjoys how she doesn’t feel bogged down by a “bulky workout clothes.” If you’re interested in copying Kate’s swag (ha) check out these shorts, shirts, and jackets.

They’re mom AND daughter approved ;)

PS – Don’t forget to join my Motivation to MOVE Challenge!!

Hillbilly Days

This weekend, my mom, uncle and I made the voyage to Pikeville, Kentucky for quite the unique festival: Hillbilly Days.

FYI: This is real life.

So was the moonshine I drank with my cousin, Amy.

As was the first fried oreo I’ve ever tried. So is the fact that my life is forever changed. No big deal.

Speaking of fried food, there was no shortage of it in downtown Pikeville this weekend. While I didn’t get any porky cheese fries, I did try some butterfly chips (SO GOOD) and chicken on a stick.

Also real life: the amount of beer consumed by my mother, uncle, and cousin Kevin.

Our cousin Kevin threw one hell of a party on Saturday night. There was a live band, moonshine, tons of food, matching shirts and jorts. I mean seriously, what more could anyone possibly want?

While 15 hours in the car was painful (thanks to Danny for driving!) it was absolutely worth it. I honestly can’t tell you the last time I laughed so hard for such an extended period of time. I feel insanely lucky that my family members are also my friends!

 

 

What More Could I Ask For?!

It’s been a little over three months since we moved into our new house, but this weekend we had our official housewarming party!

Don’t you adore these cookies?! Check out Kate from Kooking in Kate’s Kitchen - she’s amazing! 

Although we’ve had several parties since we’ve moved in, this was the first visit to the new digs for several friends and family members. That said, many of the “regulars” were here, and it was a great time!

My mom is the cutest.

There was more than enough food….

And the bar was stocked…

Cory’s favorite: bourbon & ginger

And we spent the afternoon hanging around the people we love the most. Although I was nervous to have a party all about my house, it was a perfect day, and my heart is full. What more could I possibly ask for?!

…Maybe for a one certain university to cancel night classes? ;)

 

The Couple that Namastes Together, Stays Together(?)

Today, Cory and I tried something new and took a yoga class together.

I hyped up this upcoming experience like nobody’s business because yoga at my old gym was totally perfect.

Cory, you’ll feel so relaxed and centered.

Cory, I LOVE YOGA.

Cory, the couple that namastes together, STAYS together. 

Cory. Get ready for your life to be changed. Forever. 

At this point Cory looked through the windows to my soul and told me to namastopit.

So, 5:30 AM came and I was ready and excited to calm the hell down and find my center.

Unfortunately, the instructor was a snobby substitute for the normal instructor. I was hoping for a nice Vinyasa flow, but she was more of a bougie show off than anything else. At one point, she asked the class “Do you guys do (insert random body-twisting pose here)?” And everyone shrugged, as best as the could while in bow pose.

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She replied in a snarky tone, “It really helps if you learn the lingo.”

At this point, I look to Cory, who looks just as hilariously as uncomfortable as I do, and I laugh out loud.

It felt worse than laughing in church during Station of the Cross.

Needless to say, Cory hated it and my words currently hold no weight in this household. I’m hoping to redeem myself soon.

Let’s chat – Do you and your partner workout together? If you’re single, do you have a workout buddy?