Abnormally Frigid (Me, Not the Weather)

Unless it’s 70+ degrees, I’m cold.

Cold is an understatement, really. I’m frigid. I’m frozen to the core when everyone else might feel “a little chilly.”

I get so cold that my nose becomes bright red. Like, so red that people feel the need to comment on it all the time.

Jerk 1: Woah, what’s wrong with your face?

Jerk 2: Hey, Rudolph! 

Jerk 3: Are you sick? Your nose is BRIGHT RED.

Me (Jerk 4): I’m abnormally cold, okay? Back off, you sweaty beast. 

In case you were wondering, I believe Hell to be somewhat like a camping trip to Arctic Tundra and realizing a little too late that you forgot socks.

I digress.

Cory insists that we keep our house at a bone-chilling reasonable 64 degrees. No matter how loudly my teeth chatter, or how often I grunt I’M SO FUCKING COLD, Cory’s response stays the same: Go put on some more clothes.

And put on more clothes I do. A t-shirt, long sleeved shirt, hoodie, leggings, pants, two pairs of socks, and slippers. (For once, I’m not dramatically exaggerating.)

When I watch TV, I bury myself with blankets and pillows, and I become annoyed when I have to pee, forced to leave my cocoon.

The only enjoyable thing about cooking is feeling the gust of heat when I open the oven.

And don’t get me started on getting out of the shower. Mis-er-a-ble.

But last night, things started looking up. Cory surprised me with a gift greater than diamonds or pearls.

These are the best things about walking into Costco. I’m that girl who stands in front of these space heaters with her face thisclose to the cage oohing and ahhing about this is what Heaven must feel like.

If I do that in public, you can imagine how I acted in the comfort of my own home.

No blankets or socks?! It’s practically summer here at our place! ;)

Comments

  1. says

    I am cold all the time too! I have a blanket that heats up.. I used to sit in front of space heaters and I steal the comforter in bed and my fiancé had to find himself a new blanket… hey a girl has to do what a girl has to do!

  2. says

    I was literally just about to comment on how you weren’t wearing sucks! Put some clothes on you fool, it’s January ;)

    On a side note – I feel like you today. I have on a chunky sweater, my peacoat is STILL on, as are my gloves…I’ve been in my office for almost half an hour. TOO COLD TO FUNCTION!

  3. says

    64 degrees in the house is not reasonable (mine stays at 68-69), I am also abnormally frigid all the time, and there is nothing I enjoy more than being in a giant cocoon of sweatpants and blankets. Your space heater looks amazing – what a thoughtful gift :)

    • Cory says

      Just so we are clear, the thermostat is only set to 64 over night and between the hours of 8-5 when nobody is home. Otherwise it is set to 66 upstairs and 67 downstairs. Totally reasonable…..I am glad Colleen made me sound like a cheap abusive jerk of a husband. :-)

  4. Ashley Crute says

    I’m witha! If I could I would keep all of my surroundings at a warm 70 degrees, 75 if its a day like today!

  5. says

    I’m the same way!!! always cold. I had to put in a specific request at work to keep my classroom at a warmer temp than the rest of the building because otherwise I was shivering so bad I felt sick and had a hard time teaching! I still wear a few layers to work every day even though my room is significantly warmer than anywhere else in the building.

  6. says

    Haha I say the same thing to my husband about putting a jumper on…now he says it after he’s put a jumper on and I’m stumped. So I give in and put the heating up!
    Work is the worst though. People clearly like working in arctic temperatures!! I do not.

  7. says

    Bahaha this is totally me too. I’m always freezing, and my husband tortures me by keeping the house super cold (in my opinion). The worst is the toilet seat…I hate waking up in the middle of the night to pee and feeling like I’m sitting on a ring of ice. Apparently I need to get one of those heat dishes!

  8. Jacque says

    I understand that completely! Shaun insists that the house stays at 68, so when I’m at home I’m wearing a t-shirt and sweatshirt, sweatpants, socks and slippers and I have a blanket on at all times when watching television. When I go to get out of the shower in the morning, I make a horrible face reminiscent of a child who just got their favorite toy taken away! That heat dish looks amazing right now.

  9. says

    ahhh ME TOO. My boyfriend always feels my fingers and toes and is like “JESUS WOMAN.” (except he didn’t mean jesus, he really meant ESKIMO WOMAN”.) I totally embarrass myself when I’m visiting his family too because I always have on a huge hoodie (hood up, duh gansta) and then ask for blankets.
    Except at night I need it cold. NO sleeping if it’s hot.

    • Colleen says

      Oh, I look so hood all the time (duh.) What other way to wear a hoodie when it’s freezing?! My fingers and toes are like ice cubes all the time. When we go to bed, Cory gets genuinely upset if I touch him with my “ice feet” or “ice fingers.”

  10. says

    I’m always FREEZING in my house too! Except I have no one to blame but my stupid self because I apparently can’t figure out our thermostat. I swear I set it to 68-70 but it’s never a degree over 64 and I’m always SO cold. It’s awful! I walk everywhere and do everything with a blanket around me. Just once I’d like to get out of the shower at my own pace instead of as fast as humanly possible because I need warm clothes yesterday.

  11. says

    Haha, I’m the exact same way and take my space heater with my every where I go in the house. I mean every where!! My husband jokes that I look like a person who has to cart around one of those oxygen tanks with me every where I go. Seriously, you’ve got to try putting it outside of your shower/bath tub (a safe distance away, of course) and getting out of the shower will no longer be miserable. :) I also like to put my lotion bottle a few feet away from it so that it warms up and doesn’t chill me to the bone when I put it on. Okay, I’m starting to sound a tad crazy so I’m going to stop. :D

    • Colleen says

      OMG the lotion bottle trick is BRILLIANT!!! I, too, carry with me everywhere! I think the oxsygen tank comparison is pretty accurate haha!

  12. says

    Oh you crack me up! Yeah, Cory and I would get along great then; I keep the apartment at 70 only because Kenneth freezes enough as it is. I always tell him to put on more clothes or get more blankets. Luckily we have a “fireplace” and he sites in front/on it all the time!

  13. says

    It was -43F when I left the house this morning for the bus, and it’s predicted to be about -40F tomorrow morning. My nose has seen better days for sure. Let’s just say that I’m okay doing steady state running at night, as I’m basically doing all kinds of sprint work through the bitter cold whenever I need to go somewhere.
    Your nose wouldn’t even be questioned around here, but I don’t think it’s a fair trade for having to deal with the shit we’re putting up with this week. :)

    • Colleen says

      -43?!?! HOLY SHIT. That’s insane. You win, my friend. :) PS, I didn’t know you started a new blog!! I’m definitely following!

  14. Mary Ellen McCarthy says

    I am the same way. lots of layers inside the house and outside the house. I was hoping the hot flashes of menapause would help.. NOT. My nose also turns bright red from about November to April. I work with special needs students and they ask me every day why my nose is red. They are especially confused when we are inside and my nose is still red. No one controls my thermostat except me, but I have it programmed for 68 while I’m home. 66 while I should be sleeping not shivering. and 64 when I am AWAY. This is all for financial reasons. Maybe Cory will let you bump it up to 66 during these extremely frigid days and nights.

  15. Mary Ellen says

    I forgot to mention getting out of the shower. Freezing. It does me no good to shave my legs. I am one of those people that when I get cold the hair on my legs grow. And of course I have double and triple hairs coming out of one folicle.

  16. says

    I’m the same way, always freezing! Wishing I could bottle you some Florida warmth and send it your way!! I’ll tell the heat to start making its way to you ASAP!!!

  17. says

    hahah this is great! My bf decided to live in a one bedroom (in DC that is just ridic unless you are a baller bc they run 1800 a month…) so in his attempt to save some money he doesn’t turn the heat on. His apartment habitually sits at 60 degrees. I purchased insulated leggings that I wear and yesterday I was in said leggings, additional yoga pants, a tshirt, hoody, northface, socks, AND a scarf. I slept in the entire ensemble as well bc his bedroom windows seep cold air. I need that fan STAT.

  18. says

    My husband says the heat needs to be on 64 – we do not heat the house for me to wear shorts in the winter and we don’t cool the house for me to wear sweatshirts in the summer. I am always cold, I am bumping the heat up this week because it is near 0 all week long!
    I love the heater!

  19. says

    I would die if it was 64 degrees in my house all the time. We keep ours at 72 during the day (when we’re home) and 68 when I go to sleep. And my husband still complains that he’s cold at 68. 64 is fine for walking or running, but if I’m sitting still I would shiver uncontrollably.

  20. says

    omg I am that girl too! Growing up I always vowed that I would never ever ever have my house be that cold…I would rather pay extra for heat and not die. Luckily my husband is ok with a little heat so we don’t fight about it, but I’m still always cold. A dual control heating blanket for our bed was the best gift ever!

  21. teresa (Katie's mom) says

    I have a product for you ….Under Armour…. it’s a very thin base layer you wear under your clothing. Best thing since sliced bread. good luck :)

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