DENIAL Many women experience this stage of breastfeeding prior to childbirth or soon thereafter. Most common thoughts and beliefs during the denial stage are: this will be easy!, it’s the most natural thing in the world!, and breast is best! Don’t fret, the denial phase is short lived and soon gives way to the second phase
ANGER During this stage of breastfeeding, a woman may experience a strong urge to punch her husband in the face each time he presents her with a crying child and says “I think the baby is hungry.”
BARGAINING It’s not uncommon that during this stage of breastfeeding, grown, otherwise intelligent women attempt to make deals and truces with a newborn or tiny child who cannot yet even control his or her own bowel movements. If you’ve ever uttered phrases such as, “If you make it through this trip to Target without crying uncontrollably, I will nurse you as soon as we get home” or “I promise if you stop demanding a nighttime feeding, I will buy you a pony” you are not alone.
DEPRESSION The realization that you are no more than a feeding factory and that your entire life revolves around being milked start to sink during this stage of breastfeeding. Clear signs that you’re in this stage include, but are not limited to, finding yourself watching countless hours of television and scrolling through Facebook and Instagram on your phone until you develop carpal tunnel in your dominant hand.
ACCEPTANCE Whether you breastfeed for two hours or two years, at some point you accept the fact that you’re doing what’s best for you and your baby. You also accept the fact that you’ll want to throat punch anyone who tries to tell you differently.
It’s also important to note that the breastfeeding process is not a linear one. You can experience these stages out of order, more than once, or not at all. Happy milking!